Fight for it
by EverUnattainable
Summary: There were two things in life which Naruto was absolutely sure of. One, putting metal in a microwave was never a good idea, and two, a person should always do everything in their power to not let the Uchiha's have what they want. ItaNaru SasuNeji.
1. Chapter 1

Contrary to popular belief Naruto Uzumaki was not stupid. Yes, he did once let Kiba convince him that dragons were real, and there one was that time he used metal in his microwave. But the blonde haired twenty one year old was not so oblivious that he didn't notice the way Sasuke Uchiha was staring at his roommate. And while Neji Hyuga had never been accused of being slow, he was, as Naruto put it, 'an utter retard' when it came to realising that people were checking him out.

"Neji?"

Preoccupied with retrieving a water bottle from the depths of his bag, his friend made a vague noise of acknowledgement.

"I'm concerned for the virginity of your arse."

The water entering Neji's mouth made an abrupt exit through his nose. Regaining his composure he sent the blonde a scathing look. "If you are going to make such moronic comments could you not announce it to the _entire_ corridor."

"The entire corridor needs to know how far I'll go to protect the bastard from raping you."

"The bastard?" Neji snorted. "You actually think Uchiha succumbs to human emotions such as lust? Tch, he doesn't want anyone."

Naruto really hoped that wasn't the slightest hint of regret he could hear in Neji's voice. Sure he wanted his friend to be more social, date more (date at all), but not with the world's most arrogant arsehole. He was probably reading too much into it, Neji freely admitted that he thought Sasuke was a prick. Still...

"We're not going to his party tonight." It was a well known fact that Sasuke lived with his older brother off campus, in what could only be classified as a mansion. It was the first time he'd held a party and Naruto had made an executive decision that they would attend in order to save the night from disaster. It had nothing to do with the fact that Naruto though it might be kind of fun, nothing at all. Obviously the bastard didn't know how to have fun.

"I wasn't planning on attending anyway."

"Who said you were invited loser?"

Naruto whipped around to face Sasuke's smirking face. There was no doubt the comment had been directed at him. "Ha you actually think you could stop me from getting in bastard?"

"I don't think, I know." His gaze slid to the brunette and his smirk widened.

"Just you watch. I'll be there and there's nothing you can do to stop me. Now quit eye raping Neji."

The long-haired brunette in question let out a hissed. "Naruto."

Sasuke arched a brow before walking past them without another word. Naruto glared after him before a triumphant grin spilt his features. "I'll show him. He won't be so smug when I'm dancing in his living room tonight."

Neji sighed. "You do realise he just manipulated you into attending tonight."

"No he di...damn. Damn him to hell and back. I'm so going to look like an idiot if I don't go now."

"You already look like an idiot," Neji informed him blandly.

**-Break-**

Naruto wasn't one to mope over things he couldn't change. It was why he was currently rummaging through his shared wardrobe for something to wear to Sasuke's party. Neji was being less than cooperative. He was sitting on his bed and reading a book. The first rule that the brunette had laid down when they'd started to room together was that under no circumstances was Naruto to interrupt while he was reading. He'd tried once and remembering the consequences still caused him to wince. But Naruto was nothing if not persistent.

Holding a pillow out in front of him defensively the blonde emitted a small. "Neji?" Predictably he was ignored. Gathering his confidence he repeated the name a little more loudly.

"Naruto. What am I currently doing?" Neji's voice was eerily calm.

"Er," he was still using the pillow as a shield. "Reading."

"Then, Naruto, why are you attempting to talk to me?"

Taking a deep breath, because he knew he could only win if he had the element of surprise, Naruto launched himself at his roommate. A brief scuffle ensued before the blonde finally had one very pissed off brunette pinned beneath him.

"I'm not going to that party alone."

"You're the one who said Uchiha was going to rape me."

Naruto snorted. "Yeah and you so didn't believe me. It will be fine, we'll just dress you up ugly." He eyed the pale beauty under him "Er, really ugly."

"Hn."

"We've been over this Neji , that's not a real word."

Thirty minutes later they were on their way to Sasuke's party. Neji was in sulk mode, which meant that outwardly he appeared as impassive ever if you didn't know him. But Naruto was well aware of the slightly downturned lips and don't-piss-me-off aura surrounding him. His attempt to make Neji ugly had been thwarted by the brunette's vanity. Apparently it didn't matter if he didn't look unattractive because he could take care of himself just fine. That's not what the blonde was afraid of. He was concerned about the fact that Neji might as well have 'rape me' painted on his forehead, coupled with the fact that Uchiha's always got what they wanted. Now you might think that these two details were unrelated, but you'd be wrong. It didn't help that Naruto could grudgingly, very grudgingly admit that Sasuke was sinfully attractive. If Neji really had been regretting Sasuke's seeming indifference earlier, then tonight could turn out very, very badly.

"Alright, we'll go in, find the bastard and leave. Simple as that."

Half an hour later he had no idea why he thought finding Sasuke among the thousand or so people there would be easy. It didn't help that he'd lost Neji about fifteen minutes ago. He'd never been to a party this huge before, it was impossible to take a step without running into someone.

"Naruto."

He craned his neck to try and locate where the voice had come from. A mop of shaggy brunette hair appeared in his line of vision. "Kiba."

"Man you look like you could use a drink, here." His friend chucked him a beer. Naruto eyed it contemplatively for a moment before shrugging and draining it.

"You got any more?"

"Yeah. I can't believe you came without booze."

"Wasn't planning on staying. You seen Neji?"

Kiba looked confused for a moment. "Yeah. He looked kind of panicked come to think of it, which is weird 'cause he pretty much always looks like he's bored. I guess this isn't really his scene though. Last I saw he was going upstairs with Uchiha."

"WHAT? And you just let him?"

Kiba looked truly bewildered now. "Well why wouldn't I? Sasuke was probably just being a good host or something."

Right, Kiba was strictly a tits man, he wouldn't have even noticed how enticing Neji was looking. Wouldn't have seen anything wrong with two guys escaping partygoers for a minute. Still... "Are you nuts? Sasgay never does anything that doesn't have his best interests in heart. Oh my poor little Neji, you've doomed him and his virginal arse."

"Eh? Oh...oh gross dude. Chill out will you, it's not like Neji would ever let someone take advantage of him. If they're up there boinking then I'm sure it's totally consensual. "

Naruto groaned. "That's what I'm afraid of. Look I'll see you later."

He pushed past crowds of people until he'd reached the stairs. Racing upwards he noticed there were far less people on the second floor. Opening doors at random did cause some mental damage. Especially when he came across a couple that looked suspiciously like Sakura and Lee doing something that resembled a sideways tango. The next door he opened revealed a young man in a suit, talking on his phone. The strangeness of the situation caused him to pause. Realising he was no longer alone, the man turned inquiringly to face him.

And for a moment Naruto forgot how to breathe. Glossy raven hair framed porcelain white skin, falling either side of two eyes which were an impossible garnet colour. As he willed himself to stop staring, Naruto noted absently that the man looked a little like the bastard.

Ending his call the man offered him a smirk. "Well, and what do we have here?"

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**So, um, if people like this I will continue. If not I'll delete it and try again with something new. I would really love some feedback, just so I know what I'm doing wrong and hopefully right. Thanks so much for reading. (This chapter was edited 24/10/10).  
**


	2. Chapter 2

Naruto made a small, embarrassing gurgling noise as his brain tried to process something other than _'OhMyGodHe'sSoHot'._ Sanity returned as the other man cleared his throat.

"Ah, yeah, right. I think I must have the wrong room." It looked like a study of some sort, which, the blonde realised with a curse, meant he probably wasn't even close to the bedrooms. A huge oak desk covered with papers stood against the far wall. And in the middle of the room sat a black, leather lounge suite that looked entirely too comfortable. _'This is ridiculous. Nobody needs to live in this kind of extravagance.'_

He turned to leave but the man's silky voice stopped him. "And who's room might you have been looking for?"

Unwittingly he found himself facing the other again. "The bastards."

A faint trace of amusement ghosted across the dark haired man's features. He considered Naruto for a moment, his eyes caressing the blonde as they travelled his body. There was nothing subtle about his admiring gaze, which Naruto found strange, because he was sure this man could do subtle very well when he wanted to.

"I see. And am I supposed to know who that is?"

"Well, yeah, seeing as how you're at his party and all."

The man's face took on an impassive mask that would have made Neji proud. "You're looking for his room. Are you hoping to find him in it?"

For one bewildered moment Naruto wondered if he was missing something. Then he realised what the other was implying and his mouth dropped open in horror. "Oh god no. It's not like that. I need to stop him from raping my friend."

A dark look flashed through garnet eyes, though his face remained stoic. Naruto frantically wondered why he found the dangerous edge to the man's gaze hot as hell. Surely seeing someone murder you with their eyes should not be a turn on. Then again, all this man really had to do for Naruto to be interested was stand there and breathe.

"My little brother would never do such a thing."

Naruto gulped. "Your...your little brother, oh man," he laughed weakly. "You know I didn't actually mean rape per se when I said that. I know Sasgay," he coughed, wincing at his own stupidity. "Uh Sasuke that is, would never do something like that...probably. Anyway I shouldn't go around saying it. I guess people might take it the wrong way, er, kinda like you did. But yeah...I'm not sure where I'm going with this. Um, If Sasuke knew I said that though, he would probably just smirk and call me a moron, so you know, don't take it badly or anything." There was a lengthy silence. "Did I mention how much I liked your tie, that is a nice tie you've got on there."

The man, who Naruto now knew was Itachi Uchiha, continued to stare at him. His gaze held an intensity that was making it a little hard to breathe. Starting to feel defensive the blonde scowled. What was with this guy anyway? He didn't know him and he had no right to stand there judging him. _'I tried to apologise,'_ he thought irritably. Feeling distinctly uncomfortable under Itachi's unwavering gaze, he let anger overtake him.

"Listen arsehole I said I was sorry. Quit staring at me like that. Actually you know what, it doesn't matter I'm out of here."

To say he was surprised when a hand grasped his arm to prevent him leaving, would have been an understatement. Naruto's anger frizzled out. The hand holding him was smooth and warm. The touch causing butterflies to explode in his stomach and take flight. They were standing close now and the tension in the air was so tangible he could almost taste it. His senses were overwhelmed by the tantalising smell of cinnamon and something else...something unique and wholly belonging to the man in front of him. It caused the blonde to inhale giddily.

"Tell me, what is your name."

It was a command not a request. And no matter how much Naruto wanted to lean forward and taste the mouth that housed a voice like molten lava, he bridled at being told what to do. He wrenched his arm free of the other's grasp.

"That's for me to know, and you not to find out unless you want a restraining order."

The dark chuckle that graced his ears as he left the room, promised this would not be their last meeting.

**-Break-**

Sasuke smirked at the warm bundle curled against his chest. All of his other bedroom encounters combined could not have measured up to the pleasure he'd experienced taking Neji's virginity. The fiery brunette had put up a hell of a fight for dominance and even in submission had proved passionate and demanding. Now, sleeping in his arms, a dark mark adorning his porcelain neck where Sasuke had claimed him, Neji was unbearably gorgeous. A fierce surge of possessiveness raced through the raven. Whether he knew it or not, Neji Hyuga now belonged to him.

His eyes flew to the door as it opened, his hands tugging at black silken sheets, until their lower halves were properly covered. His brother walked in, looking uncommonly restless. A smirk spread across his face though, as he took in Sasuke's companion.

"Neji Hyuga, I'm assuming."

The raven in the bed couldn't help the smug expression which blossomed on his face. "Of course, I told you I was going to make him mine." Neji stirred but didn't wake. "Why do you look like the teenager whose porn stash was taken away?"

"I need to know the name of a blonde, tanned man who seems to refer to you as 'the bastard'."

Sasuke's brow shot up in surprise. "Naruto Uzumaki? Why?" He took a moment to study his brother and was astounded by what he saw. Itachi seemed ready to pounce, his whole body alert with anticipation. "Oh hell no. Listen, whatever attraction you think you felt towards the plebeian will vanish if you actually spend more than two minutes in the same room with him. I guarantee it."

He was prevented from saying any more as the bundle on his chest shot upright, abruptly awake. A hiss of pain left the brunette's lips, no doubt from jostling his still sensitive lower body. Sasuke wasn't all that surprised when Neji cuffed him over the head.

"If I can't walk today, I'm going to castrate you."

Sasuke snorted and pulled Neji into his arms again. The brunette squirmed and elbowed the raven but Sasuke valiantly held on, letting the other bruise him. Grudgingly letting his lover hold him, it took a moment for Neji to realise they weren't alone.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? Leave this room at once."

Itachi stared blankly at the brunette. It was a look that easily intimidated most people. Three seconds later a pillow came sailing towards his head and it was all the raven could do to avoid being hit. When he'd collected himself and looked over to the bed, his outrage was tempered by the sight that met him. Sasuke was laughing, actually laughing. His arms still wrapped around the slim brunette who was scowling at Itachi, even as a light blush dusted his cheeks. If the eldest Uchiha knew how much people would pay for that moment captured on film, he would have taken a photo. As it was he simply turned and left the room, thoughts fixed on a certain blonde and how much more interesting life was about to become.

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**Thank you much so to those wonderful people who reviewed, added this to their alert list or favorited it. You guys are the reason I decided to continue this story. Some helpful constructive criticism I received suggested that I add more description and less conversation. So I tried to describe the room and people better but I'm not sure if I succeeded. Please let me know how I went and by all means tell me how I can improve this. I will try to incorporate your suggestions to make the next chapter better, so long as they are constructive suggestions. Thanks for reading, I hope people are still with me.**


	3. Chapter 3

Naruto glared at the traitor, hoping the brunette could feel the weight of his gaze pressing into him. Neji continued to read, either uncaring or unaware of the blonde's intense gaze. He wasn't going to give up though.

Finally, with a sigh, Neji put his book down. "It's been a month Naruto. Get over it."

This was the moment he'd been waiting for. "Hey, I am not the one being a prick here. I forgave you for sleeping with the arsehole, but there is no way in hell I can forgive you for dating him. Seriously man, what happened? You used to think he was as much of a bastard as I did."

Neji sighed again, as though explaining something to a petulant child. "Naruto, Sasuke _is _a bastard. But he's my bastard. If it bothers you so much go find your own."

The blonde gaped at him. "What? Are you crazy? I don't want one!" An image of intense garnet eyes and a confident smirk flashed through his thoughts. Naruto scowled. That was nothing more than misdirected lust.

"Tch whatever. The Uchiha corporation is having a barbeque to promote inter-office cooperation today. You're coming and you _will _act civilised towards both Sasuke and Itachi. This is non-negotiable. Now leave me alone, I'm trying to read."

All of Naruto's protests were soundly ignored. Slamming the door dramatically, he left the room. The blonde snorted. _'Stupid Neji. There is no way in hell I'm going to that damned picnic.'_

Two hours later a very disgruntled Naruto was in the car and on his way to the Uchiha residence. Before they left he'd taken the opportunity to change into his jeans which clung to him like a second skin. Then he'd put on the shirt which Ino said made him look like a little like a sex god. Not because he was trying to impress anyone though, as Neji had the audacity to suggest. Just because he could. There was nothing wrong with dressing up every once in a while.

He fixed a scowl to his face as he followed Neji through the house and out the back to where the barbeque was being held. Sasuke excused himself from the conversation he was having the moment he spotted them. He kissed his boyfriend and fixed Naruto with a smirk that implied he knew something the blonde didn't.

Before Naruto could ask him what the hell he was staring at, a hand landed on his shoulder. He turned around and came face to face with Itachi.

"Mr Uzumaki." His voice was a caress. "I'm so glad you could to join us today."

Naruto resisted the urge to step forward and mesh his lips with the raven's. Instead he tried to pull of the impassive look, which the three people he was standing with seemed to have perfected. Naturally he failed. "I wasn't kidding about the restraining order."

"I wonder that you should feel the need to mention it again. You did come willingly to _my _house Mr Uzumaki, both times if I'm not mistaken. Tell me, does my presence make you...uncomfortable."

Naruto hated that Itachi wasn't using his given name. It made the conversation impersonal, even as the smouldering look which the other sent him implied that it was anything but. He was as confused as hell but he wasn't prepared to let it show. If Itachi wanted to act all better-than-thou then Naruto would too.

"Of course not Mr Uchiha. I was joking." He flashed him a winning smile.

"Indeed. Well I had best make sure the rest of my guests are enjoying themselves as thoroughly as you are. Neji was kind enough to accept our invitation for dinner after the barbeque is over. I hope you'll join us."

As he walked off Naruto whirled around to glare at his friend. The brunette had failed to mention anything about that. Neji smirked at him and Naruto decided if that if he had to be at this stupid function then he was at least going to try and enjoy himself. His gaze travelled to the pool and he rolled his eyes. _'Stupid, rich bastards'_. Naruto had always dreamed of having a pool once he got his own place. He wondered if it was heated.

Biting his lip, he decided it probably wouldn't hurt to check. If Neji continued to date the bastard then maybe he would even get to use it one day. He tried to look nonchalant as he passed through the clusters of people spread throughout the back yard. When he reached the pool he ignored the group standing nearby and stuck a hand in the water. He grinned as he realised it _was _heated. Maybe if he had to stay for dinner he could use it tonight.

Naruto wasn't deluded enough to think that what happened next was an accident. What he really wanted to know was how Sasuke made it look like one. All he really remembered was feeling a body collide with him from behind. The next thing he knew his head was breaking the surface of the pool. He spluttered and glared up at the smirking bastard who had just apologised and asked if he was alright. The glare was somewhat ruined by the water dripping down his face.

"Don't act all innocent, you so did that deliberately."

Sasuke glanced at the gathering crowd. "What a horrible thing to suggest. Though if you really believe that, I guess you won't be willing to let me take you inside and find you some dry clothes. Itachi, I can play host for a while if you want to take Naruto to the house and get him cleaned up."

Naruto gaped, as Itachi smoothly agreed. _'How the hell did they...I didn't even...oh man this is bad.'_ Thoughts stumbling over one another, he grasped the hand Itachi held out to him and let the other help him out of the pool. The blonde overbalanced and rocketed into Itachi's chest. Their bodies pressed intimately together as the raven helped to steady him.

He ignored the woman who let out a breathless, "Oh, Mr Uchiha is so thoughtful" and pulled away with a scowl. Being in Itachi's arms had felt right for all the wrong reasons. Naruto stomped over to the house, knowing that the elder Uchiha was following him.

Once he was safely inside, he stopped. Itachi placed a hand on the small of his back, steering Naruto in the right direction. Warm breath brushed the blonde's hair as Itachi spoke, sending a shudder through his body. "Though I'm sure you put those jeans on with the express intent of having me remove them, you didn't quite have to jump into the pool to make it happen. You could have just asked."

Naruto flushed. "Just because you Uchiha's have some stupid notion that everyone wants you, doesn't mean it's true."

Itachi laughed, the sound smooth and fresh. "I've never believed such a thing, though it's nice to know you do. I confess to wanting you too, very much so."

He rolled his eyes. "And Uchiha's always get what they want?"

His answer came as his back connected solidly with the hallway wall, a pair of lips taking his own in a searing kiss. Naruto acted instinctively, grasping Itachi's shoulders as a sinfully talented tongue coaxed his own out to play. As his mouth was thoroughly explored, the raven moulded their bodies together. A breathy moan escaped his lips, startling the blonde, and sending his thoughts hurtling back to the present. Just as he was about to push the other away, Itachi stepped back, untangling their bodies as though pre-empting Naruto's next move.

For a moment they simply stood and stared, both flushed, dishevelled and half hard. Then Naruto exploded. "What the hell was that? You can't just go round molesting people you stupid, arrogant prick! And just so we're clear, I was like one second from pushing you away when you pulled back. So don't go thinking I was enjoying it or anything retarded like that."

Itachi looked amused. "I'm sorry, was this implied molestation before or after you grabbed my hair and pulled me closer? Now if you've finished dripping on my floor, I'd appreciate it if you'd follow me to my room so I can find you some dry clothing."

"What? Like hell am I going into your room alone with you. You'd probably rape me and _I'd_ get the blame." He put on a fake, falsetto voice. "'Oh Naruto, how could you possibly allow your arse to get in the way of Itachi's beloved cock."

The raven raised a brow before heading down the hallway. "I'll be in my bedroom. It's the second last door on the left. When you've finished your hysterical rambling feel free to join me."

Naruto willed his heart to stop racing. It was just a stupid kiss, he'd been kissed plenty of times before. And it didn't matter how right it felt because Itachi was simply toying with him. So that settled it. He would not give in to temptation no matter how much he might want to.

With a grim smile the blonde followed Itachi down the hall.

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**Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed ^_^ I hope you're still enjoying this. I would love to hear what you think of the story, good bad or otherwise.**


	4. Chapter 4

Naruto snatched the dry clothes from Itachi's grasp and took them to the adjoining bathroom. He set his face in a disapproving scowl and made brief eye contact with Itachi before firmly closing the door. He would not encourage the other's advances and pretty soon Neji would realise that Sasuke's superiority complex was incurable. Then everything would go back to normal and he could avoid the Uchiha's and their condescending ways until they finally understood that nobody toyed with Naruto Uzumaki's feelings.

Giving the mirror his best shit-eating grin, the blonde quickly changed his clothes, trying not to consider how this was embroiling him deeper in Itachi's life. He would simply wear them home and then the next time Neji visited princess Sasgay he could return them. Taking a moment to block out images of his recent dalliance in the hallway - which may or may not have involved humping Itachi's leg - Naruto straightened up and strode back into the bedroom. The raven was standing exactly where he'd left him, small smirk in place. His eyes glimmered as he assessed the blonde in his clothes, smug amusement radiating from his body.

"Quit it asshole. I uh, I already have a boyfriend. So yeah, yeah don't even think about repeating that whole molesting thing you had going on back there."

"Curious that your best friend has never met this alleged boyfriend. In fact Neji was informing me just yesterday that you were single." He took a step closer. "Not that I'm doubting you, of course."

Naruto did his best to murder Itachi with his eyes. "Yeah, well, Neji only wishes he knew everything about my life. If you want I can get my incredibly masculine and good looking boyfriend to call you right now and tell you to piss off." A moment later the very-helpful-but-rarely-present voice in his head decided to point out the obvious flaw in this plan.

"I'd be delighted to speak to your boyfriend. In fact, why don't you invite him around for dinner. You and Neji are staying right?"

"Alright smartass maybe I will."

'_Wait, what did I just agree to? Oh shit, oh crap, oh fuck. Think quick Naruto. Don't make the hole you've dug so deep you can't jump out of it.'_

"Excellent. What did you say his name was?"

"Sai."

'_YOU MORON. WHAT DID I JUST TELL YOU? AND WHAT DO YOU DO? YOU GO FILL THE HOLE AND DIG A FUCKING CRATER.'_

"Shut up."

Itachi looked genuinely taken back, not surprising considering he wasn't privy to the debate currently occurring in Naruto's mind. "I said nothing."

Naruto bit back his retort of "not you" just in time. He may not want the guy's attention but that didn't mean he wanted him thinking he was a nut job. He very deliberately took out his phone and scrolled to Sai's name, while trying desperately to think of away to escape the mess he'd created. Itachi was looking expectant, like he was waiting for Naruto to break down and confess he didn't actually have a boyfriend. HA, well he was in for a surprise, Naruto Uzumaki didn't give up that easily.

Hey prayed to every deity he'd ever heard of that his friend wouldn't answer. One, two, three, four, five rings...and then. "What do you want dickless?"

Naruto tried to make his grimace into a smile. "Sai, baby. How are you?"

A lengthy pause followed this greeting. "I really hope you're high right now."

He wished Itachi would leave the fucking room so he could explain the situation. "That's good. So me and Neji are at the Uchiha's and Itachi has oh so courteously invited you to join us. But if you're busy I understand."

"Is Uchiha high too?"

He grinned triumphantly at Itachi, who remained silent, no doubt wondering what Sai was saying. "Oh you can't come. Well that's okay babe, maybe some other time."

"You know Naruto, I always suspected you didn't have a dick but this is just confirming it."

"Uh, yep. Love you too babe. So yeah, Itachi was molesting me...but I guess if you're about to help that old lady across the street, then you don't really have time to tell him to back off. I'll pass that message along."

There was a brief pause. "It's okay dickless, I'll be over to rescue you in about half an hour. Until then."

Naruto's eyes widened comically. "Wait! What. Sai do-."

"This should be fun. See you soon." Naruto gaped as his friend hung up.

Itachi looked smug again. "So?"

The little voice in his mind helpfully supplied _'So you're fucked now. Upstream without a paddle so to speak, in the bed without a condom, making dinner without food, playing the piano without a paino, masturbating without a hope of getting o-'_

"Okay, I get it."

Itachi's brow crinkled slightly. "I beg your pardon."

Naruto groaned, wishing he had something to bash his head against, repeatedly. Well, dinner was certainly going to be an interesting affair tonight. Maybe, just maybe if he could greet Sai first and get him alone for a second things would turn out okay. Or maybe he was going to end up looking like a desperate, delusional university student who needed to get laid. Yeah, sadly that seemed more likely.

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**Sorry. I am so sorry. No excuses, I just haven't updated this in forever. I don't even know if people are still reading or even remember that this exists. But if you are, thanks you're amazing.**


	5. Chapter 5

Neji eyed the blonde sceptically. "Do you really expect me to believe that you and Sai have secretly been dating for the past month? I suppose dickless is a form of endearment then?"

Naruto brushed imaginary dust from his t-shirt and offered the slim brunette his most condescending look. "You've been so wrapped up in princess Sasgay lately that I hardly expected you to notice." He crossed his fingers and waved them in front of Neji. "Me and Sai are like this okay?"

Neji snorted inelegantly. "Very well. Just remember that when this little charade of yours fails spectacularly, I'll be there to say I told you so."

Naruto glared after him before discreetly finishing off his text to Sai which offered the other a substantial bribe to stay at home. He had no idea what his friend was playing at but it wasn't promising to end well for him. The blonde had declared that he would wait out the front for his 'boyfriend' in the hope that he would be able to talk to Sai alone. The rest of their small party had joined him, however, to see off the last of the guests and they were still lingering. Naruto resisted the temptation to smash his head against the wall as Sai's car pulled up in front of the entrance.

He bolted to the driver's door and opened it, letting out a loud cheery "Hey babe" before ducking his head and hissing out, "What the hell Sai? Look, just pretend to be my boyfriend and I'll make it worth your while okay?"

The raven gave him what had been dubbed by their friends as the 'creepy smile'. "How worth my while? I'm not just some cheap whore you know Naruto?"

The blonde glanced up a little frantically. "Fifty bucks. Come on man."

"Two hundred."

"WHAT? LIKE HELL AM I..." he trailed off as he realised the other three were listening intently. "Uh, um, sorry babe, but I just can't believe anyone could be so generous and thoughtful and loving. Like hell am I able to accept such an extravagant, tasteful and most importantly, expensive gift, you'll just have to take the car back." Lowering his voice again, he leaned in to peck the raven on the cheek and hissed. "Fine two hundred, but it better be convincing."

He reminded himself not to scowl as Sai slung an arm around his waist and steered him to where the others were standing. He noted a little gleefully that Itachi was emitting a distinct 'pissed off' vibe, even while his face remained impassive. He did his best to ignore Neji's disbelieving stare. Sasuke was clearly struggling to figure out which of the two he disliked most.

"Itachi this is Sai. Sai, this is the arsehole who molested me."

His 'boyfriend' directed his creepy smile at the eldest Uchiha. "Now now, you really shouldn't touch what isn't yours."

"Yes, well, I am tremendously sorry that your boyfriend felt it necessary to throw himself in a pool so that he could wear my clothes, then take offense when I merely offer to help him out of them. Perhaps if you were a little more adept at pleasing what's yours then others wouldn't feel the need to touch."

Naruto scowled as they turned to go inside. Sai didn't seem overly concerned by the admitted molestation of his fake boyfriend so the blonde elbowed him sharply and mouthed "defend my honour". The raven mouthed back a quick "you have no dick" before drawling, "That was uncalled for Mr Uchiha. I think you've hurt the feelings of my poor little babycakes."

A horrified Naruto tripped over his own feet at the endearment even as Neji choked out. "God I will pay someone to make the words stop coming out of his mouth."

Naruto sighed. It was going to be one hell of a long night but if he could pull it off then Itachi would stop the quest to conquer his body and find someone else to play with.

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**I'm so sorry guys. This is way too short but I just don't know what to write next. I am working on it though. I promise the next chapter will be longer I just don't know when it will be up. I have never actually seen an episode or read up to the point where Sai is a character in Naruto, so sorry if he is a little OOC. Thank you so much if you're still reading.  
**


	6. Chapter 6

Naruto took a large gulp of the wine Itachi had poured for him before remembering how much he hated the taste of any alcohol that wasn't beer. He barely refrained from spraying the dinner table as it overwhelmed his taste buds. Sai and Itachi were currently engaged in World War Three, only with far less shooting and a lot more verbal abuse. Never the less Naruto was still fairly sure there were going to be casualties before the end of dinner.

"An arts course. I see. And what may I ask, are you hoping to achieve with this? I'm inquiring out of concern naturally, these days you hear of so many people graduating with a diploma of arts and no viable work skills. I would hate to see you end up unemployable. "

Sai kicked up the creepy grin and laid a hand on his 'boyfriends' thigh. "Yeah, well that's probably one of the super duper things about being in a relationship with Naruto. I just know that no matter what happens he will always be there to support me. Won't you sweetums?"

Knowing that this was a situation of his own creation didn't make listening to Sai create a new pet name every thirty seconds any easier. He nodded feebly, trying to send the raven death through his gaze. "Ah, excuse me, I need to use the bathroom."

"Do you require assistance finding it?" Itachi inquired smoothly.

"NO! Hahaha, no, it's fine, everything's fine, I'll be right back. Ah, Sai, babe, why don't you come with me?"

"No, I'm good."

The blond's teeth ground together as left the table and started down the hall. As soon as he was out of earshot he grabbed his phone and frantically called Sakura.

"This has better be good Naruto."

"The bastard's demonic but possibly also very attractive older brother molested me and then wouldn't stop trying to get into my pants so I pretended Sai was my boyfriend and then Sai agreed to come around for dinner because he's an absolute dickwad and now I have to pretend like I like him and it's really hard and I fucking hate the taste of wine and Sasuke is a stupid ice princess and Neji's a filthy traitor who's never getting first shower again and if I don't take a breath pretty soon I think I'm going to faint."

There was a heartfelt sigh from the other end. "So basically your immature and asinine belief that all Uchiha's should be opposed in every aspect of life is preventing you from having sex with one of the most desirable men in the country.

Sakura knew him so well. "Right. So clearly the only option left is for me to climb out the bathroom window and wait for you to come pick me up."

"Naruto do you remember when you got your hand stuck in the cookie jar and then got pulled over by the police for driving to the hospital with a jar on your hand? Remember how I had to come pay your bail and then take you to the emergency room?"

He winced. "I try not to."

"Me too. My point is I told you that would be the last time I helped you out of a mess you'd created until you started to take some responsibility for your actions. You're on your own Naruto."

The beep that signalled he'd been hung up on had never sounded more ominous. Still fairly confident that the bathroom window was the best course of action the blond continued down the hallway. He'd taken little more than five steps when the lights went out and the windowless corridor was plunged into darkness. He froze for a moment before realising the only thing he could feasibly do was head back to the dining room and hope and wait for the power to return.

He was halfway back when he ran into something very solid and decidedly human. His hands came out automatically to grasp unseen shoulders even as his own waist was steadied with an arm.

Naruto let out a decidedly unmanly squeak. "Sai?"

"Considering you cannot possibly see I will forgive you that insult." The rumbling murmur was like a silky caress across his ear.

Definitely not Sai. "I'll scream rape." He threatened.

"Is that so? Perhaps people would be more inclined to believe you if your weren't clinging to me like a lifeline. I'll be honest _Naruto_ I'm getting a little tired of your playing hard to get. You don't need to make me any more interested, I'm already very intrigued with the idea of making you mine."

There was a perfectly legitimate reason why he wasn't pulling away, there was, really, he just wasn't entirely sure _what_ it was. Probably though it had a lot to do with how right it felt letting Itachi simply hold him. "I have a boyfriend."

"Who is obviously little more than a friend who debatably has access to privileges that undeniably belong to me."

"Doesn't make you any less jealous." He sulked.

"No, you're right, it doesn't."

Okay so there were definitely a warm pair of lips massaging his own that did not belong to his fake boyfriend. And that tongue snaking into his mouth, the hands sliding down to cup his arse, neither of those belonged to his pseudo boyfriend either.

Naruto pulled away, indignant. "How dare you make me cheat on my fake boyfriend."

"Some of the things which come out of your mouth are truly unfathomable. Gagging you, however, may cause me to miss those sinful little moans you produce."

"Oh Itachi, all this talk of gagging and rape, I always knew you were a romantic at heart. Don't let the icy glare and broody emo boy attitude scare you off ladies, when you come right down to it the Uchiha brothers are nothing but a bundle of sadistic bondage fun."

His answer was in the form of a searing kiss that left him dizzy, gasping for air. "Very well then, I'll make you a deal Naruto, if I can get you to come undone before the power is fixed you have to let me take you out on a date. If I can't, however, I am willing stop my pursuit and leave you be."

Naruto thought ruefully that it would have been a lot easier to resist if a part of him wasn't so enamoured with the idea of the something more than a quick fuck which the word date eluded to. Besides which he had never been able to walk away from a challenge.

"Heh, well thanks for making this easy Mr Uchiha. Do your worst."

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**I know, I know, I suck. Kudos to you if you're still reading this and many thanks. This story has one hundred and fifty three alerts which has kind of blown me away. You guys are awesome.**


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